I'm not an addict
I gave up caffeine on August 26, 2006, in preparation for the effort to get knocked up. I figured it was better to kick the habit before the stress of trying to conceive really kicked in, and to give myself as much time as possible. I went cold turkey, and I suffered through four days of -- I kid you not -- vision-blurring headaches. Friends told me I was stupid to give it up completely, but I knew two things: First, I lack the willpower to slowly wean myself off anything. It's got to be all or nothing. Second, I knew cutting the caffeine entirely would be horrible -- so bad that I would never, ever want to go back.
I was right. Or at least, I was, up until now.
Regular coffee is calling to me. And real Diet Cokes. And maybe the occasional, adult Coke, in the pretty red can, with all that sugar.
The other morning I made a pot of coffee that was half-regular, half-decaf. Twenty minutes later I felt the oddest sensation: Awake. The colors of the world were more vivid, maybe because my eyes were actually wide open. My brain couldn't keep up with all the stuff I wanted to accomplish. I felt like myself, only myself two or three or 10 years ago. Eager, energetic, maybe even happy.
I'm not going back completely. At work, it's still caffeine free Dike Coke -- I know all about the brain tumor I'm giving myself, thank you, but I figure the one I'm getting from cell phones will be bigger. After 10 a.m. or so, I'm solely a decaf kind of girl. But I've started adding at least a spoonful or two of the good stuff the pot in the morning, a little jump start to the day.
It feels good, even though I know better. I'm in complete control of my habit. Really. I swear. Pass the half and half.
posted by AnnaRay at 12:29 PM
4 Comments:
Welcome back!
With the Mrs. working at Starbucks, we get a free pound of coffee a week..
any requests?
REALLY??? You gave it up all that time? I would have serious problems without coffee. More problems than I normally do. Sentence fragments, even. I was bad and drank coffee all throughout my pregnancy, until I got the pre-e and then felt like I needed to subsist on water and air. The best was when a colleague would come up to me, as I was getting a Coke/Diet Coke or something (not much else would stay down in the first months), and say "...um...don't you worry about the caffeine?" I would want to say all sorts of things, and I was glad I did not. ON ANOTHER NOTE: YOU MUST GET THE KOSHER FOR PASSOVER COKE. Trust me on that one. It is the real, pre-1983 formulation and will take you to a happier place. Drink some coffee and feel better. Decaf sucks.
I've heard rumor of the kosher Coke, but never actually been able to convince the Bosslady to allow it in her house. And yet we already have our gefilte fish.
Did you know that those brilliant folks at Starbucks sell a half-caff blend in the grocery store? They're my favorite new enablers.
Get you some Coke and HIDE it. In the car. It's not like you'd put it into the sippy cups! Anyway, if you only get the Kosher kind, it only comes out once a year, and then it's what they call an "occasional treat." It's the chosen kind. I'm off to catch mouse!
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