Radio silence
We're all a little out of it this week: Judybat is finishing the work on the new bathroom -- literally, at the moment she is on her hands and knees scraping down the door so our contractor can paint it tomorrow -- and I've been working like mad. But you'll note that it's her turn to post, right? So I'm off the hook for any guilt about our lack of blogging?
Or perhaps I should be feeling guilt over the fact that she's pouring herself into household chores to have something to focus on besides the fact that my dysfunctional family arrives in a week?
Hmm.
posted by AnnaRay at 10:35 PM
27 Comments:
Hmmm! "dis"sed again or perhaps I should say "dys"sed again. That's funny- we feel very functional. You must have been referring to cynicali. Cheers!
as far as i can tell i am functioning properly.
...you know what they say, you can't make dysfunction without fun.
I certainly didn't mean that as an insult. Every family is screwed up, in its own unique and fascinating way.
You know what they say, you can't make dysfunction without a lot of marriages.
Let the holiday festivities begin!
And careful, Bellingham, or I'll have to bring up the gift spreadsheet.
OK, you win. We yeild. The gift spreadsheet was supposed to be confidential information.
Actually, we yield. (didn't want you to think we can't spell) Being dysfunctional is bad enough.
Is that a joke?
Is there really a gift spreadsheet?
Planning for retirement is one thing, golf scores is pushing it, but a holiday gift spreadsheet?
If I didn't know better I'd think I was in for a weekend of business meetings and meet and greets.
(there aren't going to be any business meetings are there?)
Yes, Virginia, there is a holiday gift spreadsheet.
It depends. Do business meetings include martinis?
"business meeting" has just become my new favorite and soon to be overused euphemism
What about "getting close to God?"
Drink enough martinis and you'll feel like you're close to God (via the intermediate step of feeling close to death).
I'm glad my folks don't read my blog. They read the first few items then asked, "very nice, but isn't this taking up too much of your time?"
Ohhh kayyy.
And as for holiday gift spreadsheets. What's wrong with that?
This year for me, very easy: gift money to godchildren. insulting card to best friend. nothing to parents (they're in the Philippines). a modest "gift for the whole family" to my relatives in Cali whom I'll see. oh, and a gag gift for yesterday's party. this xmas is frickin' great.
I am pretty flighty when it comes to current favorite overused euphemism.
Martinis are so yesterday. The new drink of choice in our house is hot chocolate with peppermint schnapps. Not that we've already begun drinking heavily or anything.
Every year, we seriously think about buying our relatives animals to help poor families in the Third World. One of these days, my mother is going to open her big gift to find a goat. Seriously.
And that gift will go over as well as the year your mother thought it was a good idea to sponsor two children from third world countries for a year as a gift for you and Cynicali. As the big gift it was not a hit.
yeah about that... what were you thinking?
i've never been that selfless.
We were CHILDREN. You are an adult. Baaaaaaa.
Sheep go "baaaa". Goats, well, we know what goats do.
yeah. goats get given as presents to parents who give their children's toys to starving kids in ethiopaia.
that would be ethiopia
They EAT goats in Ethiopia. Goats taste good washed down with a martini. .
BTW, the old/NEW drink around here is egg nog. That stuff is really, REALLY good, and it reminds me of Grandma. Especially with bourbon.
...but goat and egg nog sounds like a trip to the toilet.
I am sure that there is a joke to be made about eating goats and eggnog memories of grandma but I am just too good a person to even think of going there.
But seriously, is there room for goats and bourbon-egg nog on the gift spreadsheet?
We went to a party this weekend, and they were serving punched-up nog. It was great, except to get it, you had to go down to the basement and let one of the hosts take your picture.
It wasn't as kinky as it sounds. But it does sound pretty damned kinky.
Out of curiosity, how do you all get 25 (26 now) comments on your postings? Should I take it personally that I can barely get 2?
Well to begin you have to track the number of people reading, cross index that with the relative verbosity of each individual, then multiply the results by the sum of the holiday cheer invoked by family mockery and you should have your answer.
In short, it takes a spreadsheet.
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