My new mantra

We've got a full house this weekend: My mother and the Once and Future Stepfather are here from the Great North, and my brother and his lady-friend are up from SoCal. The OFS drives a very swanky Volkswagon SUV, complete with leather seats, cool red interior lighting, sensors that beep if you're too close to another vehicle, machine guns for those nasty traffic jams and a GPS thingy that tells you how to get anywhere you might be going.

The GPS is amazing. You type in your destination, and this efficient-sounding woman who apparently lives in the dashboard guides you: "Prepare to turn left in 500 feet," or "Take the second left," or "Make a U-turn, dummy!" She's even smart enough to come up with new directions if you miss a turn or opt not to listen to her very specific instructions. And every so often, she pipes in with my new favorite Zen mantra, "Continue to follow the road."

That's a rule to live by, isn't it? Work got you down? Continue to follow the road. Fight with your spouse? Continue to follow the road. Getting tired trying to peddle your bike up that last hill on the way home? Continue to follow the road. I like the implication that goes with that, too, as if she's really saying, "Continue to follow the road. I'll give you more instructions later." Or, "Continue to follow the road. We'll figure it all out eventually." Or even, "Continue to follow the road. As much as you might wish it, you're not actually in control here. So relax. Chill. Stop worrying. Just keep driving, and we're sure to wind up someplace interesting. Until then, how's about a nice cookie?"

Through modern technology, I have found inner peace.